the wonderful lovestory of my son cas and his boyfriend dean

or "the one where i had five daughters until i finally had a son named castiel and tried to make him gay"

rating: a for awesomeness (pg-13 for language) (is pg-13 even a rating) (not that a is a rating)
characters: me, castiel, dean, castiel's sisters
pairing: destiel (not supernatural-destiel)
summary: a true story about my future where i have a son named castiel who is totally in love with a guy in his sister's class, dean.
warnings: mentions of a possible supernatural end
notes: this will probably be made into a movie by the summer of 2013 with jacqueline emerson as me, trevor peterson as castiel and brock kelly as dean winchester (yes he's totally the dude who played young dean in supernatural).

THE WONDERFUL LOVESTORY OF MY SON CAS AND HIS BOYFRIEND DEAN

(the one where i had five daughters until i finally had a son named castiel and tried to make him gay)

the doctor (not from doctor who unfortunately): "it's a baby boy!"

me: "fINALLY, DESTIEL HERE I COME"

the boy is named castiel.

during all of castiel's childhood i tried to convince him that he was actually interested in boys.

when castiel was 15 he came home from school;

cas: "hey mum i've kind of got a girlfriend her name is meg"

me: "CASTIEL GODDAMNIT WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THIS YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GET A BOYFRIEND NAMED DEAN"

not-cas-3 (one of cas' sisters): "mum i think you're way too obsessed with this 'destiel' thing..."

me: "SHUTUP AND GO TO YOUR ROOM NOT-CAS-3 YOU'RE NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE BORN"

not-cas-5: "actually, there's this new guy in my class, pretty sure his name is dean"

me: "THANK YOU, NOT-CAS-5. you're alright. can you please bring him home here and introduce him to castiel"

not-cas-5: "sure mum i'll see what i can do"

a couple of weeks later castiel gets home after seeing dean;

cas: "actually, mum, i uh... i think i'm gay"

me: "about fucking time. so it's dean you're in love with right"

cas: "well... yeah..."

a few more weeks later;

cas: "so yeah i'm with dean now"

not-cas-1: "wow, congratulations lil bro, mum's going to be so pleased"

me: "I HEARD 'MUM' WHAT'S GOING ON"

cas: "i am dating dean now"

me: *FLIPS MYSELF OFF A CLIFF IN A GOOD WAY*

cas: "...mum?"

me: "right so uh when are you getting married have you kissed him yet can you please cosplay as cas and dean from supernatural so that i can post some pictures on my tumblr my followers will love this do you want me to invent something that allows you to have a baby or are you just going to adopt a child anything's fine by me i just really need a destiel child you know????"

not-cas-4: "...are you alright"

me: "i'm great thank you i'm just really overwhelmed with feelings dying whale noise"

not-cas-1: "is this something tumblr-related again i'm not sure i can deal with this one more time"

me: "oh and cas it'd be great if you and dean cosplayed waves i'll buy you an oversized sweater and make you look hipster"

cas: "what's waves"

me: "this really great destiel fanfic you should read it it's like 50k words rated m really really cute and stuff"

cas: "also being hipster is so 2012"

me: "are you trying to make me look old because i'm not"

cas: "sure mum"

a couple of days pass and cas spends all his time at dean's house.

cas (on the phone): ”i'm going to stay over at dean's tonight if that's okay”
me: ”of course make sure to have sex”

cas: ”mum you're so awkward”

me: ”i just want to make sure you don't get a case of blue balls”

cas: ”what... why would you even mention that i'm your son and how do you know about that”

me: ”i read a lot of fanfiction that's how i know”

cas: ”is that why you always clear the browser history when you've used my computer”

several months later everything is gr8. until cas comes home from a vacation with dean and his family.

cas: ”dean's such an idiot, i hate him”

me: ”no you don't get to say that, what happened”

cas: ”he dumped me”

me: ”HE DID NOT”

cas: ”well he did”

me: ”no no no no no”

cas: ”honestly mum why do you even bother”

me: ”do you eVEN UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED A SON”

cas: ”not this again”

me: ”I'LL TELL YOU WHY I WANTED A SON”

cas: ”mum you've already told me this a thousand times when you tried to convince me how gay i am”

me: ”IT WAS THE YEAR OF 2014”

cas: ”sigh”

me: ”THE LAST EPISODE OF SUPERNATURAL SEASON 10 WAS JUST ABOUT TO AIR”

cas: ”can't get out of this now right”

me: ”DESTIEL WAS STILL NOT 100 PERCENT CANON”

cas: ”mum”

me: ”THEY DID KISS ONCE AND THEY EVEN TALKED ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY LOVE EACH OTHER”

cas: ”...but they decided that it was impossible...”

me: ”BUT THEY DECIDED THAT IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE AND THAT THEY COULDN'T BE TOGETHER”

me: ”THE TRAGIC LOVESTORY OF A HUNTER AND HIS ANGEL”

cas: ”supernatural wasn't even a lovestory”

me: ”WE ALL KNEW THAT 10x22 WAS GOING TO BE THE LAST EPISODE EVER AND THERE WERE MANY THEORIES ON TUMBLR ABOUT HOW IT WOULD END. WILL THEY CLOSE THE GATES OF HEAVEN? WILL CASTIEL FALL? OR WILL HE DIE?”

me: ”BUT NOBODY WAS PREPARED FOR WHAT HAPPENED”

cas: ”technically you just mentioned that what happened was one of the theories”

me: ”SAM AND DEAN CLOSED THE GATES OF HEAVEN AND TRAPPED CAS INSIDE”

me: ”DEAN WAS INCONSOLABLE”

cas: ”yeah you showed me some gifsets of that he didn't even cry”

me: ”WHEN THE SHOW ENDED WITH THE WINCHESTERS DRIVING OFF INTO THE SUNSET WITHOUT THE ANGEL I KNEW WHAT I HAD TO DO”

me: ”I HAD TO GIVE THE WORLD WHAT THEY WANTED”

me: ”DESTIEL”

cas: ”right if it means so much to you i'll try to talk some sense into dean or whatever”

5 years later dean and cas got married and adopted a son that i named bobby. actually they named him something completely different but i refused to call him his real name. to me he would always be bobby.

the end~